Ladies Staring As Other Ladies Stand

My time spent milling around at my high school Ive noticed something that i think every girl does. You can be siting in the commons area or wherever you are that there is a mass, mixed sex number of people and watch. Say at my table there is just me and 4 other girls, (not that im like gay, or a womanizer, or anything, i just know 2 of them and that's just where Ive sat since 9th grade; the other skank girls just managed to migrate to "my" table this past year) one girl can get up to go empty her tray, say one of the ones i know and one of the trailer trashy looking girls' eyes will follow the other girl, up and out of her seat and follow her back into her seat when she returns. I see this and i watch those trailer trashy eyes, watching the watcher. All girls will do this. They are simply sizing up the other same sex animal. Not that there all lesbians, its just a natural girl thing to look at another female and judge them, compare themselves to them like, "Oh man i am glad my ass isnt that big" or in like one of those really sassy girl tones " Oh my god, i cannot believe she would wear that out in public, hmphh what a tramp". ..

The First of Not So Many

I have things to write, but the paper with words on them is not here and to be quite honest I don't think im quite here either... Have you ever been bogged down? Has anybody ever been stuck? My ankles seem so far deep in tar right now I just hate waking up. School, at the moment, is really just a Fifty ton weight thrown on my back with "dictators", teachers, following me on my plight. They load us students down, down, down, with so many things. I am a senior so it goes a little something like this... Wake up at a godawful time of day, 6:30 in the morning, which is way to early for at least my own human body to be functioning at. Well someone says, well you should go to bed early. Ha, they apparently dont get it. My body, my mind is so tired from the previous days and those previous days before that, my body or mind never has time to catch back up. So unbalanced. But with this "Senior Quest" and teachers throwing other assignments at our brains it all just seems way too much. Give us a break. We dont even want to be here, the majority of us that is. Its pretty much like a prison. The students are forced to attend that prison, and be broken down physically and mentally by that prison. Then after that prison some kids attend the next stage of their hell...their homelife. Now, would i call my homelife a hell? No, I wouldnt go as far to call it a hell just a complex homelife filled with drunken fatherly OCD rampages of condescending and irrelevant arguments. Not so bad right? I guess it's better than going home to the same thing but also getting the hell beat out of you by an abusive parent. I manage. I manage all of this, i get my work done, most of it, and pass just pushing towards that graduation day, Freedom Day, Finally...